Okay, Fortune, you can stop snickering now.

So after recently posting that the new Editor would still run my column, he emailed me today to say that they're cutting expenses so my column will be reduced to once or twice a month. These budgetary excuses always ring so false to me -- or perhaps I must believe that the board of newspaper accountants came together and said, "Twenty dollars? We can't afford that kind of money! Drop that local boy, the funny one. Nobody in this town likes laughing anyway, and we sure need that double-sawbuck."

Indeed a strumpet. Fine, be that way, Fortuna. I'm going to have a great month anyway.